Raiders Of The Lost Wit

Having been a speaker at several science fiction conventions, I have had the pleasure of meeting a variety of celebrities in my time… and a distinct lack of pleasure, after meeting others.

Celebrities are just as prone to idiocy as the rest of us. (If that comes as a surprise to anyone reading this, I would like to suggest here and now that this might not be the blog you’re looking for…) I have learned this over the years from personal experience, and as a rule, most “news stories” about the earnest political beliefs of Major Industry Figures bore me.

Every little once in a while, though, one of these stories catches my eye… and this one is a prime example of the vocalizations of the species Celebritus Cranio-Rectalis:

“… Harrison Ford launched a broadside at US policy on Iraq, his country’s gun laws – and the film industry for producing “video games” for teenagers.

Of the three issues, the one area where I am willing to grant Mr. Ford professional credence is in his views on the film industry. As to the rest… well, he’ll have to take his chances like any other idiotarian citizen:

“I’m very disturbed about the direction American foreign policy is going,” said Ford, with US post-war casualties having exceeded those during the actual conflict.”I think something needs to be done to help alleviate the conditions which have created a disenfranchised and angry faction in the Middle East.

“I don’t think military intervention is the correct solution. I regret what we as a country have done so far,” said Chicago-born Ford, 62.”

I am at a loss to know how to respond. Does Mr. Ford think that, oh, the Iraqi people are somehow less “enfranchised” than they were under Saddam? Or was I asleep when the memo went around that changed the meaning of the word “enfranchised” to mean “subjugated to a brutal psychopath and his murderous offspring”?

Or perhaps Mr. Ford is talking about the Palestinians, whose “heroes” vent their anger at being unable to commit genocide with frequent bombings directed against innocent women and children?

Or maybe he is in sympathy with the Taliban, who have been “disenfranchised” in Afghanistan, and thus prevented from exercising their right to stone women to death for adultery, without even following their own religion’s legal precepts on due process, required witnesses, and the burden of proof?

Or is Mr. Ford worried about the plight of Osama bin Laden, who hopefully is not only disenfranchised, but disemboweled?

One hopes Mr. Ford is worried about his memory. Because he seems to have forgotten THIS.

I have not.

Given what Mr. Ford appears to be using for memory, I marvel at his continued success as an actor.

Not being content to be known as a purely internationalist moonbat, Mr. Ford continued to regale the press in Madrid with equally …cogent… comments about US domestic policy:

“Although on screen Ford has starred in many action-packed, gun-toting thrillers – his Hollywood Homicide alongside 25-year-old Josh Hartnett is, in fact, more designed as a comedy – Ford abhors liberal US gun laws.”

For my part, I abhor US liberals’ attitudes about guns. But I admire Mr. Ford’s almost CAIR-like chutzpah, given the nature of the roles in which he has had the most success.

(“CAIR-like chutzpah”. I cannot tell you how much I hope that gets back to some CAIR types… )

“I’m very troubled by the proliferation of arms, at the fact so many people in the United States carry guns. “

Like Indiana Jones? Or Jack Ryan?

It must be lovely to have such a supple conscience.

“….It obviously contributes greatly to the crime problems we have. I’m sure gun laws should be strengthened in the United States. I just don’t know the correct mechanism.”

No, I suggest you don’t know your American History.

Or your American Civics.

Hint to Mr. Ford: A Google Search on “Constitution US 2nd Amendment” would be a fruitful start, as you remediate these weaknesses.

After that, may I suggest a refresher course in statistics? That you might examine… oh, the difference in violent crime statistics between states with restrictive concealed carry laws, and states that have “shall issue” statutes which make concealed carry permits easy to obtain?

After THAT, perhaps a beginning course in logic, so you can examine the fallacies inherent in the assumption that felons who commit violent crimes care about gun laws?


If I didn’t know that celebrities are no saner, no wiser, no more learned or virtuous than the general run of the citizenry, I’d be depressed.

Ah, well. The article wasn’t a total loss. The author of this piece wins the “money quote” no-prize for the week:

“…. At a safe distance from his homeland, veteran Hollywood actor Harrison Ford launched a broadside at US policy on Iraq, his country’s gun laws – and the film industry for producing “video games” for teenagers.”

That hissing sound? Oh, it’s just the air being let out of Mr. Ford’s pretensions.

“At a safe distance from his homeland…”

I would love to be able to claim I wrote that.